New Life...

After learning about the world of male bathrooms, I decided to pay a little more attention to what we do in the ladies room and why we do it. I'm am quite sad to report today that us ladies do not display the same caliber of bathroom etiquette as do our gentlemen friends. This is kind of how it works in our bathroom rules...

1. Come in with at least one other girlfriend, and talk the entire time. Don't you worry about those who have shy bladders. It's all about finishing your conversation. You can even stand right outside their stall door.
2. Don't go in the really big stall unless you have children because that is the baby changing stall.....aka - the nastiest bathroom stall on the planet. Hands touching a poopy baby tush and the touching everything else in the bathroom...yucky!
3. Use as much toilet paper as you like, and please make sure to use more than you need. No worries if you stop up the toilet. The person after you will just clean it up. (This really happened to me the other day. I was the next person who walked into a bathroom with a half inch of toilet water covering the floor. In the overflowing toilet, I found the remnants of what could have been an entire roll of toilet paper.)
4. Brush your hair enough so that it falls all over the floor.
5. IF, and I did say IF, you wash your hands, do that wonderful hand flicking thing that gets the excess water off of your hands and right onto the mirror.
6. Any excess water that isn't removed in this manner can just drip onto the counter as you reach for the paper towel dispenser. Toss it in the garbage after you dry your hands, because it is no longer useful to wipe up the water you just dripped everywhere.
7. If you get too caught up fixing your hair, reapplying make-up, or you just have too much stuff to carry (kids, bags, purses, etc) don't even worry about washing your hands. That's why the rest of us just don't touch the door handle on the way out.

GIRLS, what are we doing???? We've gotta tighten up. I love you all very much, but the people that clean up restrooms after us hard a very unpleasant job (trust me - I am this person sometimes). Having seen the inside of both facilities (at our church), I would gladly use the men's restroom if I could. I am no longer offended by a lid left up. They do us a favor by lifting it in the first place. I'd rather put a lid down walk into a bathroom covered with toilet water (while wearing sandals, by the way).

I believe that all is not lost, though. WE CAN clean up our bathrooms. WE CAN develop etiquette and consideration that will make the female restroom experience better for all of us! WE CAN!